We all have to make decisions in life and not everybody is going to be happy with the decisions that we make. Sometimes this also includes our closest relationships.
The man in the following story experienced this in his life when he made a decision to go on vacation. He had a girlfriend who wasn’t able to afford the vacation, so he decided to go alone.
This caused him to wonder if he was doing the right thing, and he posted the information on Reddit. Read the details below and then you be the judge if he was in the right or the wrong.
Hi all, I (39M) am dating someone (33F) and have been for the last 3 months. Things are going well until the topic of my 40th birthday came up.
Next year I turn 40. And I’ve never taken an actual vacation. I’ve extended work trips to do something fun where I am. I’ve traveled to visit friends or family. Always just for a long weekend (never more than 3 days total). I want to take a week and travel purely for recreational purposes. My criteria is that the trip needs to be at least a week and be international.
I’ve also worked hard to get my finances in shape since my 20s. And now I have a decent business and some money set aside and I feel like I’m ready for a trip and next year would be a great opportunity as it is a milestone birthday.
My girlfriend is great. She works hard and supports herself. But she doesn’t make as much money and, most importantly, is currently saddled with around $20k in credit card debt arising from a period of unexpected unemployment she had in the past that forced her to burn through savings and live on credit cards.
When the topic of this trio came up she first asked if she could go. I said sure. She then asked if we could go to Vegas. I told her about my desire for this to be an international trip. Then she expressed concern over if she could afford it while in debt. I told her I’d be willing to cover our lodging and, depending on where we go, help her pay for airfare. Because we haven’t been dating long I don’t feel comfortable paying her whole way and feel she should contribute financially to come along.
She then told me she didn’t feel she could afford to cover meals + half airfare even if I went somewhere relatively cheap (I was thinking possibly carribean where trip flights are running typically under $500). So I said that I understood but I also have been wanting to do this milestone birthday thing for a while now and I still intend to go even if just by myself and would only be gone a week.
She became upset that I would travel without her and it caused a bit of a fight. My friends and family are split. On the one hand some point out how many things I wanted to do but didn’t get to do because my ex refused to “let” me and so I should go forth with or without her. On the other, some are saying it is cruel of me to be planning a vacation in front of a person who is trying to pay off large amounts of debt anyway.
