Sat. Dec 9th, 2023

After last week’s catastrophe when Chef Gordon Ramsay was incensed by the hosts of The View during his rare appearance and stomped off the set in an unholy rage, the entire situation has escalated.

As usual, and as anyone who’s seen the man’s programs, Ramsay isn’t taking the insult lying down. He’s full on leading a charge across Hollywood and the American community to have The View completely cancelled.

“I want that f**cking show off,” he blew up at our crack reporter Joe Barron. “I want it gone and f**cked off properly. That cow Goldberg can get a job at one of your Walmarts, saying hello when people walk in the bloody door.”

That’s quite a bit of angst from America’s favorite English chef. Ramsay went on, telling his audience that the program had no real value, and that the hosts were…unqualified.

“They’re a field of bloody dumb donkeys, is what they are. You know, I’ve never met anyone who’s opinions and thoughts I’ve cared about less.”

Whoopi Goldberg herself, had a brief response to Gordon’s blow up and explanation.

“Tell him to put more extras in the seats for ‘Kitchen Nightmares’ so that it looks real, and stop all the blatant fakery on Hell’s Kitchen. I mean, it’s funny how he makes it a competition to get those black shirts, even though the winner’s name is already printed on one.”

Ramsay’s response to Goldberg was unprintable on a family page. But it rhymes with “duck stew.”